Sunday and saying Good-bye

On Sunday, everyone was up and about by 8am. As the kids ran in and out of our room playing, Caleb saw what he thought was a piece of candy near Marta's stash and thought to pick it up and put it in her box. However, when he picked it up he realized it was just an empty wrapper and put it back on the table where he found it. Nancy saw him put the empty wrapper down and, thinking he was pilfering her candy, told Marta. Marta flew into a rage, smacked Caleb on the arm a couple of times and went and took a handful of Caleb's candy. Caleb started saying, "I didn't do it, I didn't do anything." I hadn't seen what happened, but I could tell Caleb was innocent, so I told Marta so. She became doubly mad at me for taking Caleb's side and flew out of the room with the girls in toe. Yikes!

After a couple of minutes, I was able to get Caleb to explain in detail to me exactly what happened. He went out to play with Carlos and Reyna wandered in. I explained to her what happened and she was very understanding. We had an awesome talk about how difficult it was at first for Marta in Reyna's family. She had a very hard time believing they really loved her like their own children. She said it took about 2 months for it to get better and for her to settle in. She also explained that she used to get the most mad at Carlos, of all the children (and yet the night before it was the two of them that seemed the closest). Before long, the girls came flying back in the room and so I explained to Marta what Caleb had done. Instantaneously, she said she was sorry and came to give me a hug, then said sorry to Nancy and gave her a hug. Then I explained to her that I don't love Caleb more than her, that I love them both. Reyna jumped right in with her support and encouragement, reinforcing everything I said. It was really beautiful. And then I told her that Caleb really loves her and wouldn't do anything to hurt her. At that point, Caleb came in and we explained that Marta understood what had happened. Reyna encouraged Marta to apologize and to give Caleb a hug, explaining to me that in their house they always hug after an apology. Marta did. Next, she went into the other room and got Caleb's candy and her candy and poured it all into the SAME container!!! Caleb was astounded and came running to tell me, he was SO happy! The two of them are still working away at that stash of candy and haven't once spat over another piece! Amazing!

Before breakfast, we spent some more time chatting with Reyna and Fidel. With Carlos' help they wrote down 15 different kinds of food that Marta likes. I have a Guatemalan cookbook, so making these for her will be fun. We also exchanged phone numbers and addresses so that we can be sure to keep in touch. Reyna has no contact with the little girl she fostered before Marta and so has needed a lot of reassurance that we will keep in touch. I'm glad they want this, too. They are such a special family. We are very blessed to know them.

Next we had breakfast all together. The kids had staring contests while waiting for the food and it was pretty hysterical to see who could and couldn't keep a straight face (Marta has a look that can kill, as does Nancy. Vilma and Caleb giggle hopelessly!). After breakfast the kids went to swim in the hot tubs again, but they were too hot, so they ran through the cold waterfall until they couldn't take it any longer. Then, we got all of our things packed up and ready for check-out.

For lunch we headed down the hill to the hotel we had stayed at in July 2007. They have a large pool with a 2 story slide. The kids all wanted to swim, but unfortunately, there was no time at that point. Instead we went to have lunch on the veranda with views of the lake and a local band playing indiginous music. When we first arrived at the restaurant, Marta wanted to go play on the miriad of hammocks in the garden, but Reyna told her we needed to eat first. Marta got angry and said she wasn't hungry. Reyna told her she still needed to wait. Marta refused to order any food and kept insisting that she be able to go play. It was great for me to see this interaction between them. Reyna just laughed and tried to cajole her, but without giving in. We finally ordered and then told the kids they could go play, but she was so mad that she wouldn't go play! Finally, Nancy grabbed her hand and pulled her along to join the other kids and she was off and "it" was over. Tim and I and Reyna and Fidel had another good talk about Marta--their insights were so helpful!

Finally, we headed back up to our hotel to await our shuttle back to Guatemala City. We had thought Reyna et. al. were going to stay in Panajachel for a few more days visiting with Fidel's Aunt, but instead they said they were headed back to the city. We were able to arrange for them to ride with us in our van, so that worked out well and saved them a long bumpy ride on 4 different "chicken buses". While we were waiting, Reyna asked a woman at the hotel to come help translate for us. I was pleasantly surprised by this conversation, simply because there really wasn't anything that Reyna wanted to tell us that I hadn't already understood from previous conversations! The language piece was truly a God-thing! But this was a chance for she and Fidel to clearly communicate to us how greatful they were for everything we had done and how happy they are that we are Marta's family. It also allowed us to tell them that we view their gift of love for Marta as a far greater gift, one that will help her throughout the rest of her life. We reiterated how important it will be for Marta to retain a relationship with them into the future--that they will always be an important part of her life. They will help her retain a connection with Guatemala, the language, culture, food, etc. Lastly, we were able to tell them just how blessed we feel to know them, they are truly an amazingly wonderful and special family, hand-picked by God to love our daughter through an incredibly crucial transition!

Soon, we were off, all piled comfortably into the van. Did I mention the road is bumpy and windy? After about 45 minutes with Caleb and Carlos riding in the back we heard an urgent cry for a plastic bag! As Tim frantically searched for one, the requests got more persistent until I finally just asked the driver to stop. The door flew open and out went Caleb to loose his lunch. Before long, Carlos joined him. :) Unfortunately, we had stopped by a farm and as the boys were doing their thing, our van filled up quickly with flies! In fact, by the time they were done, the van ceiling was completely covered with them! Yuk! Fortunately, they mostly clung to the ceiling and not to us! As we took off again, we opened all the windows and within 10 minutes or so had managed to shoo most of them out.

We arrived back at our hotel in Guatemala City late in the afternoon. Reyna called for a taxi for her family. We visited and the kids played while we waited. It was definitely a bit tense, knowing this was the final good-bye. It was dark when the taxi pulled up and we all went out to say good-bye. As the taxi drove out... well, let's just say I have a knot in the pit of my stomach just remembering. I carried her out by the water fountain and we sat together in the chairs in the garden. We wept with her as she experienced this loss in all of it's profundity. I ached for her pain and could only begin to imagine the depth of it.

After 25-30 minutes, Marta asked to go back inside. We went to our room and she watched TV for a little while. Then we went out and had a wonderful dinner at the steak restaurant down the street. When we went back to the hotel, it was late. Bedtime was hard for Marta and she wept for quite a while again. We comforted her best we could and then eventually turned out the light. "Mama, aren't you going to read to me?" I heard (in Spanish, of course). We turned the light back on and I started reading. Before long she was fast asleep. I smiled. She always seems to know just what she needs, we just need to listen well and pay attention. :)